1) Dont Fake It
Its no secret men love women who have orgasms but faking it to please
them only robs you of the pleasure you deserve to have. Besides, if he
think he is doing it right, it only makes him repeat the same style that
achieved the fictitious result, and only takes you further away from
actually having orgasms with him. What a shame. If its your first time
together, then, get off to an honest beginning. If you dont have an
orgasm, and he asks if you did, be honest and tell him the truth. The
more you like him, the more honest you need to be with him.
2) Show & Tell
Men can't read women's feelings like their palm. If you are not having
orgasms with him, show and tell your man what he needs to do, and dont
be afraid of appearing too liberated. Men love a challenge, especially
this one, and a real man admires woman who can talk her way through it.
Give honest feedback and lead him to the finish line. Its difficult to
please a woman who cannot please herself. If you dont know what to tell
him, and you dont masturbate, please start, and do use a normal size
prop without electricity (if yours doesnt have batteries). When you find
the spot, action, intensity, or combination that works, tell him what
it is, and how well you both can work on that together until you both
make "fireworks" from your energy. I call that recreation at its finest.
3) Connect
If you both are connected emotionally, the experience can last as long
as you want it to last, and it can be everything you both want it to be.
Due to abandonment and other issues, some women go out of their way to
disconnect. This behavior may protect your heart but will do nothing to
your sexual experiences. Intimacy is not sex and sex is not intimacy,
but intimate sex can be wonderful. If you have abandoned issues, try
this: Say to yourself I may not love you tomorrow but right now I love
you more than anyone I've ever known. Now connect and give yourself to
him. You just might have the orgasm of your life and he may too.
4) Dont Kick the Dog
Rejection in lovemaking is the worst of all things. Men are so much like
puppies. Imagine coming home after a long day and your puppy bounces to
the door with the most affectionate greeting, but rather than kneeling
to shower him with love and affection, you kick the poor doggy. How
often do you think that needs to happen before the little guy slows his
approach and finally stops greeting you altogether? The same goes for
men. Unless you want him to lose interest, and that can happen quite
easily, find the energy to get yourself into it, each time and forever.
5) Your Sex Drive
The only difference between a great friendship and romance is sex. In
matchmaking, I try to match sex drives right along with all of the other
stuff. When I interview men and women, I ask them to tell me a number
from one to ten, lowest to highest, of how often they like to have sex
per week. While a four and a six will usually work things out, a four
and a seven likely wont, and neither will a two and a five, let alone a
two and a seven. Save yourself six months in a relationship going
nowhere. At the earliest point possible, mention your sex drive in a
conversation so you two are on the same page.
Note: Contrary to popular belief, most women have very awesome and healthy sex drives.
(6) Think Beyond The Bed
That mattress is for sleeping, and occasionally for sex, but if your sex
life is boring, you are probably horizontal way too much. Find
different places in the apartment, and find different places other than
the apartment. Elevators, staircases, bathrooms and boardrooms are only
the beginning. Always be on the lookout for a great place to take your
lover, and if you are creative, surprise him by leading him to the spot
you discovered. Guess what sweetheart? I found a new spot. Now get over
here. Think 9 Weeks to make your love life last a lifetime.
(7) Take the Lead
Men love it when women initiate sex. secondly they feel desired and totally gets turned on when women initiate sex.
(8) Go for an Oscar
Not all women enjoy giving oral sex. The few ones who it do make their
man feel like they'd do it for as long as they wanted. You don't rush
it. Your man is always happy when you wait for him to signal you that
he's ready for it. The result is that a man feels better connected to
his woman, which will make the main event last longer and nice for you
as well. If you are one of the women who does not enjoy giving oral sex,
it would be in your best interest to pretend you are going for an
Academy Award for Best Actress in an Action Thriller.
9) Lets Talk or Not
People are split on the subject of talking during sex. Many can go
either way. Try to find out early what your partner likes and doesnt
like when it comes to talking like "I have a client that I introduced to
a devout Catholic Italian Countess. They were in Saint Barths for their
second rendezvous (their first was in Paris) when she mentioned to him
every day how difficult it still was for her (at 32 years old) to escape
the guilt of having sex. Midweek he called me for advice. Maybe she is
hinting at what she really wants, bla bla bla. Try whispering "you are
such a bad boy" while you are making love and and dont let your sex
conversation distract his attention. Sex is about pleasing your partner,
and if everybody felt that way, wed all be a lot happier. Of course,
life would be a lot easier too if you would simply ask your man what he
would like to hear or not hear.
10) Get In Sync
If you've just started fooling around, and he caresses your hair or
something innocuous like that, don’t moan like you are being ravaged by a
minotaur. Melodrama during sex is highly annoying. On the other hand,
if you are in sync, anything goes including all the sound effects of a
jungle. And if one of you does something silly, go ahead and laugh so
you both will. After all, were doing it for the fun, right?
